I have with a lot of interest realised that many of my readers have been reading my earlier posts on Christian attitude towards porn. From the comments, many are really struggling with the temptations to sin. I came across some writings from Thomas a’ Kempis devotions (1380-1471) and I felt it’s important to share. He says that we should note the following about temptations (although he doesn’t talk about porn, however, the subject is of great benefit)
1. Be on the Watch
As long as we live in the world we cannot escape temptations and tribulations. As it is written in Job, “our life on this earth is warfare.” For this reason we must be careful and concerned about our own temptations. We must be watchful in prayer lest the devil be given an opportunity to deceive us. For the devil never sleeps but “goes about seeking whom he may devour.” Remember, no one is so holy that he or she does not have to deal with temptations.-We can never be free of them.
2. The Usefulness of Temptations
And yet, temptations can be useful to us even though they seem to cause us nothing but pain. They are useful because they can make us humble, they can cleanse us, and they can teach us. All of the saints passed through times of temptation and tribulation, and they used them to make progress in the spiritual life. Those who did not deal with temptations successfully fell to the wayside.
3. The Source of Termptations: ‘Why’ W’e Can’t Run Away
No one is completely free of temptations because the source of temptation is in ourselves. We were born in sinful desire. When one temptation passes, another is on its way. ‘We will always have temptation because we are sinners who lost our original innocence in the Garden. Many have tried to escape temptations only to find that they more grievously fall into them. We cannot win this battle by running away alone; the key to victory is true humility and patience; in them we overcome the enemy. If we merely turn away from temptation outwardly and do not strike at the root, we will make very little progress. In fact, you will find that the temptations will return more quickly and powerfully, and you will feel even worse. Little by little, through patient endurance of spirit (with the help of God), you will win a better victory than by your own determination.
4. Temptations Reveal Who We Are
The beginning of all evil temptations is an unstable mind and a small trust in God. Just as a ship without a helm is tossed about by the waves, so a person who lacks resolution and certainty is tossed about by temptations. Temptation reveals our instability and our lack of trust in God; temptations reveal who we are. This is why we must pay attention to them.
5. How Temptations Enter and Overcome Us
We will do better in dealing with temptations if we keep an eye on them in the very beginning” Temptations are more easily overcome if they are never allowed to enter our minds. Meet them at the door as soon as they knock, and do not let them in. One simple thought can enter the mind and start the process. The process works like this. First, the thought is allowed to enter into our minds. Second, the imagination is sparked by the thought. Third, we Get a sense of pleasure at the fantasy, and we entertain it. Fourth and finally, we engage in the evil action, assenting to its urges. This is how, little by little, temptations gain entrance and overcome us if they are not resisted at the beginning. The longer we let them overcome us, the weaker we become, and the stronger the enemy against us.
6. Never Despair: God Is with You
‘We must not despair when we are tempted but, instead, seek God more fervently, asking for his help in this time of tribulation. Remember St. Paul’s words of assurance, “God will make a way of escape from every temptation so that we may be able to bear it.” Let us, therefore, humble ourselves before God and take shelter beneath his hand. God will lift up all who have a humble spirit and save them in all trials and tribulations. Patience is necessary in this life because so much of life is fraught with adversity. No matter how hard we try, our lives will never be without strive and grief.
Thus, we should not strive for a peace that is without temptation, or for a life that never feels adversity. Peace is not found by escaping temptations, but by being tried by them. we will have discovered peace when we have been tried and come through the trial of temptation.
7. The Pain of Temptations
“But,” you may say, “‘What about those who find such pleasure and delight when they give in to temptations?” To be sure, there is pleasure for them, but how long does it last? It is like smoke-it vanishes quickly. Soon even the memory of the joy is gone.
They will never find rest, and they will live in bitterness and weariness and fear. The very thing they think will bring them joy will bring them sorrow; that which they think will bring them pleasure will bring them only pain. Because of their blindness and numbness they may never see or feel how miserable they are. They may not even know that their soul is slowly dying.
8. The Way to True Delight
But, if you want to have true delight, here is the way: have contempt for all worldly things and all lower delights, and rich consolation will, in turn, be given to you. In proportion as you withdraw yourself from the love of these things, so you will find consolations from God much more sweet and potent. At first this will be difficult. Long-standing habits will resist, but they will be vanquished, in time, by a better habit-if you persevere! The flesh will cry out, but it will be restrained by the Spirit. The devil will try to stir you up and provoke you, but he will run away the moment you begin to pray. And above all, try to engage in useful work. In doing so, the devil is prevented from having access to you.
9. Lay the Axe to the Root
If we made an effort to stand firmly and courageously in the struggle, doubtless we should see the help of our Lord from heaven, for he is ready to help those who must in his grace; he gives us occasions to fight that we may win. If our spiritual progress relies only on outward observances, our devotion will not last long. Let us lay the axe to the root, so that being purged of unruly passions we may have peace of mind. If every year we uprooted a single fault, we should soon become perfect. But we often feel that we were better and more pure at the beginning of our spiritual lives than we are now after many years of living our vows! Fervor and progress ought to increase daily, but it is thought to be a fine thing these days if a person can hold on to even a little of those first intense feelings! If we would exercise a little self discipline at the beginning, then we would later be able to do everything easily and joyfully.
10. Defeating Old Habits
It is hard to give up old habits, but it is even harder to go against one’s own will. Yet, if you cannot overcome small, trivial things, when will you overcome difficult ones? Fight the urge when it starts, and break off bad habits, lest perhaps, little by little, they lead you into greater trouble. Oh, if you could only know how much peace for yourself and joy for others your good efforts could bring, I think you would be more anxious for spiritual growth.
HOW SHOULD CHRISTIANS DEAL WITH THE SIN OF PORN/MASTURBATION
July 22, 2014 by prayerunlimited
Hello. I have been with my husband for over 20 years and lately have been experiencing extreme sexual desires. I’m 15 years younger than he is and I’m just feeling overwhelmingly sexual. My husband is fifty and when we’re together (I force myself upon him), he doesn’t satisfy my needs! So, I started going to a Christian church nearby and one day, a person was at the podium sharing his struggle with porn. Well after that service was over, I returned home searching for porn!!!!! I have never done that before, but for some reason—-when I heard the person at church talk about it so openly, i guess I felt It was ok to do the same! I have to say, since watching porn—-I feel BEYOND GUILTY!!!! I’m a mother of a six year old! I FEEL ROTTEN FOR DOING THIS!!! I need help in stopping this crazy habit that I thought was easy to stop! I fear I’ve become addicted!
PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!
I DO NOT WANT TO BURN IN HELL FOR MY DISGUSTING SINS!!!
Dear Misa,
Thanks for sharing your predicament. It is true that porn is evil before God’s eyes. Though it sometimes looks difficult to deal with, I would like to assure you that there is nothing impossible with God. Trust him, pray against it, break from that bondage in prayer, keep off porn, speak defeat to porn and declare what God is doing in your life. Don’t give up though sometimes you may trip back, always stand and move on
i think i can now stand firm and conquer temptations that comes my ways.thanks for the write up
Dear friend,
You are confirming what is written in the Bible (ROMANS 8) that you are more than a conqueror through Christ
Hi ,
‘I was a porn addict’. I’m using was cos after going through this article and praying against it for deliverance,I see myslef declaring now that I am no longer tied up with such a demonic act. I don’t want to go to hell so I have to transform. Thaks for this article.
may the Lord set you free
Please pray for me I don’t know how to control watching porn though I’ve not had sex before I’m still a virgin but I feel guilty whenever I do it
Dear Danielle,
Thanks for the visit to my blog.
About watching porn, this is already adultery (read notes in this blog to understand more). Colossians 3:5 says that we shroud put to death such acts as sexual perversion, uncleanliness, passion, evil lusts, and covetousness, which is idolatry. In prayer, declare that you are putting them to death. Also, fill your mind with the word of God it has power to cleanse your mind. Set time for Bible study, prayer, fasting, & meditation of the word of God. Trust God to help you, ask the Holy Spirit to help you overcome. You are more than a conqueror, don’t give up.
Thank you Jesus for giving us a way out of every situation. Plead His precious blood over your self calling on His Name His blood cleanses, sanctify purify redeem and delivers us from every sin. Praise be our Lord our
Saviour and Deliverer and Redeemer.
It helped me to know who I am!